The oldest will always be the first

first time mom

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You never forget your first.

I remember what it was like being a first time mom.  I can tell you more details about my first pregnancy, labour and delivery than I can with the others.  I remember those early days of motherhood trying to figure it all out.

Not much has changed. 

Except I’m not trying to figure out how to deal with my youngest’s teething troubles or diaper rash.  I’m not stressing about my middle child starting kindergarten – no, instead I’m wondering if my oldest child is keeping up in school.  I’m trying to figure out how to improve his social skills.  I’m googling what age kids start cutting their own toenails.  Every new challenge he faces is a new parenting challenge for me also.

home work

I haven’t been there before, I haven’t done that.  I don’t know what to expect for a child his age.

So when he’s struggling with homework I’m researching how to help him.  I’m downloading different templates to use as letters from the tooth fairy.  I’m freaking out when I realize how good he is at video games because I’m not sure if all 7 year old boys are that good or if I should start him a YouTube channel.

Being a mom of three has made me more comfortable in comparison to being a first time mom.  But that doesn’t mean that I don’t still have daily panic attacks, especially when it comes to my oldest.  I second guess every decision I make with him because I don’t know how it will turn out.  I don’t know if it will work brilliantly or if it will scar him for life and the only way to find out is to wait and see.

In one month, for the first time in my life I will be the mother of a seven year old.  This is all new to me, just as it is to him.  And, similar to when I was a brand new mom, I’m excited about this adventure…

I am researching anything and everything that I might need to know.

I will run into at least one situation where I’ll have no idea what to do.

I will panic.

I will think he’s advanced for his age.

And then I will think he’s behind.

I will need to spend a fortune on clothes and shoes because he’s outgrown the old ones but will have no idea what size he needs.

I will make mistakes.

I will (hopefully) learn from those mistakes and apply them to my other children.

I might be an experienced mom of three but when it comes to him – I will always be a first time mom…

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Author: Vanessa Rapisarda

Stay at home mother of three, postpartum depression survivor & parenting blogger